EMOTIONS EXPERIENCED DURING CANCER TREATMENT: WITHDRAWAL
As humans, we rarely want anyone to know about our faults. Think about when we’re courting the loves of our lives; initially we rarely let out our little treasure trove of bad habits. Our partner seems perfect and vice versa, and in an instant we’ve got starry eyes; we’re in love with most perfect person in the world. This is part of being human. We want our loved ones to know we are as close to perfect as possible, as we believe it attracts more admiration and attention, which is really a form of love. Love is what we all desire and what we all seek, from birth through to death. We forget that love is already present within our own hearts and what we should really be searching for and attaining is inner peace.
It is no wonder that when we develop a disease such as cancer, we experience the need or desire to withdraw from people we care for and society in general. Sometimes it just seems much easier to withdraw, to avoid the questions, which at this stage we may not have an answer for, or the answer we like. By withdrawing we do not have to face questions or to expose ourselves to pity – which can be humiliating for many. By slipping into our own world we do not have to admit to ourselves or to others that we are not perfect, in a world where most people are trying to act perfect.
It is difficult for those who have never had cancer to understand the complex feelings, emotions and questioning that the cancer patient experiences. Many people associate cancer with ‘stressed, weak or aged’ individuals. This is a total fallacy. It is another reason why people with cancer withdraw from society and loved ones, as they may become labeled in this category. A category considered imperfect. Society can be extremely judgmental and no one likes to be judged. Cancer patients find it easier to withdraw to avoid judgmental attitudes.
It’s really funny how complex we have made our lives. We mentally run in circles every day, worrying what people think of us, and we often go into hiding until we are happy with the way we look, or the way we feel. This is another reason cancer patients withdraw. ‘I will come back out when I look better or when my hair grows back’.
Choose wisely whom you tell your condition to, as many people are simply gossips and live for human tragedy. Share your feelings with understanding souls whom you love and trust with your heart and you are sure to feel safer and more supported in your fight against cancer. For family and friends in this situation, ensure the cancer patient knows how much you love them unconditionally, without expectations or conditions. The cancer patient needs to be reassured of your unconditional love especially during this unstable period.
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